Believe it or not you will qualify for scholarships though you may have to take out the government loans which are about 6500 per year now. That amount of debt is workable. Many schools, including Notre Dame, give aid based on need which will be reflected in FASFA applications and any other applications the college process will lead you too. Nothing out of the question for your kids, it depends much upon how reponsible they are and their desire to not just attend college but do well at it.