The rich pay full. The poor get good help. The middle class get jacked around. They are not sympathetic. They definitely think their tuition is reasonable.
Advice: 1) Do not take the first year of financial aid as a reasonable estimate of what you will get in years 2-4. It changes, and they might pull a bait and switch and give you nothing sophomore year. There are no guarantees, except for the rich or the poor. They will not tell you that you are right on the line, and you could lose everything the next year. That is a risk you take.
2) If they offer loans, and you don't take them (e.g., maybe you are debt averse, and you decide to draw down your 529 faster instead, and hope to make up the money for your next kid), you are totally screwing yourself. You are basically telling them not to give you financial aid the next year. You have to take every loan offered if you want to play the financial aid game.
3) Do not have any savings at all unless it is in a 401k, IRA, or 529...retirement and 529 savings are the only savings which aren't counted fully. Saving for a car in your savings account? Notre Dame will count every dollar saved as available for them. Saving for a wedding? Notre Dame will take every dollar. Get a bonus from work?...ND takes it. Until your kids are out of school, you are not allowed to save for anything else but for paying Notre Dame. You must handle everything else with debt...pay for the wedding with credit cards, get a loan for the car, etc. It is all about debt.
4) They don't assume all of your kids are going to go to college. You get a benefit if you get two going at the same time. But, until that happens, they pretty much assume your other kids are going to be grocery store baggers.
Other schools are definitely more generous with aid. And, some schools will assess you once, and not change things on you a year later. For example, Miami (OH) does that. No bait and switch there. They assess you, and you will know what you have to pay for 4 years, so you can actually budget. I think people underestimate how awesome that is.