We went through this twice in the last couple years and landed on the Pilot largely for space reasons. It’s close to a minivan and gets about 26-27 on the highway so it’s the best road tripper. That said, nothing beats an Ofyssey/Sienna for road trips from w space and comfort perspective.
BUT, if the third row is for overflow rather than regular usage, the Highlander might be the better bet. It’s a little more maneuverable and comfortable. If you keep the car for a period, then I’d go hybrid. The extra $2k won’t be an issue.
Styling wise, the CX9 was up there as was the Papisade. I felt the Palisade had more rear room. But end of day, it came down to Pilot size & ride comfort versus Highlander drive ability and availability of hybrid.
All are reliable and decent resale.