You didn't disappoint with your well thought out response. Sorry the world isn't black and white enough for you.
I know for a fact from talking to the late Fr Cavanaugh, that "drivel" was pretty much included in the way the job was discussed with Leahy, Parseghian, and Devine. I can't attest to what was discussed with the others, though my guess is that there were similar discussions with every coach ND has had. I doubt there was any mention of how many wins they had to have, nor how many national championships they had to win. Because, that certainly wouldn't turn off any prospective coach.
Every coach was given a five year contract with three directives. Strive for excellence, don't break the rules, and don't embarrass the school. The subsequent contracts were then subject to review after the five years. I'm kind of glad that some were able to think a little deeper than others.