So sorry for your loss, unfortunately I can relate as I lost a son 31 years ago,

in non-military work, he was a pilot, 22 years of age, and crashed in your typical small plane crash, too many hours, bad weather, impeded vision, etc, etc.. I leaned on my faith to get me through, hopefully you have too..My son liked ND too, so leaning on Our Lady helps too..

Prayers for you..